How Can I Learn To Trust?

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Trust – Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

You cannot trust in others what you do not trust in yourself. William Dargin II

Loss of trust in others can lead to us shutting down and locking our hearts up in a jar so that nothing can enter. The problem with protecting ourselves in this way also means nothing GOOD enters either. Fear blocks us from falling in love, from making friends or having joy. Instead of opening up to new experiences we say NO to The Universe. To be able to mend our broken hearts we have to learn to trust ourselves to allow love in.

We protect ourselves from loss, being hurt and having our hearts broken – again. We tend to think that being vulnerable is a dangerous place where no good can come to us. Unfortunately this closing up and shutting down is a faithless, joyless place of fear. We cannot experience the wonders of life when we are shut down. We only experience our ego and life from fear. When we don’t trust others, we don’t trust ourselves. When we don’t trust ourselves our lives are filled with fear, chaos and drama, and we don’t feel. Fear blocks us from feeling what our bodies are telling us. Fear blocks us from experiencing the wonder of life. Allowing ourselves to be vulnerable allows love and wonder in.

When we are in fear we try to control our loved ones and everything in our lives. Controlling others does not allow them to be who they are. Instead allow them to BE themselves. Controlling others is a waste of your precious life force energy. Let go of control. We think we are helping others by controlling them, but we are not.

We often shut down and are unable to take action. Just making the decision to sit quietly and witness what is going on in our body can be enough to stop the craziness and numbing of the fear. 

Courage is what gets us beyond being stuck and paralyzed and catalyzes a forward movement. Courage is the mastery of fear that gives us the impetus to move through difficult situations in the face of fear. Fear will continue to show up in smaller ways once you master it, but will not continue to control your life.

We are so conditioned to DOING all the time, that we don’t stop and just BE. In the doing, we fill our lives with mindless and endless tasks that are wasting our precious energy when we realize we didn’t listen. We weren’t paying attention to all the signs and guidance. By stopping and asking questions in stillness our body will give us the answers we need if we listen and feel.

In stillness when the mind is quiet guidance comes through. The difficult thing for most people is the quiet part. Even those who think they can’t meditate can sit still in quiet for 10 minutes. 

When we are in fear our ego shouts at us. Our bodies feel tight and stressed. Our unconscious mind runs amok. We feel scattered, nervous, or anxious and shut off the true guidance with our fear. We tend to ask others for advice rather than sit quietly in stillness. No one knows better than you what is best for you. Our gut is our best guide. Asking questions and waiting to see how our body feels when we do will give us the answers we need. 
To be able to get to the still quiet voice though we have to quiet the ego and stop asking for other’s opinions. 

Sitting still and meditating helps. Most people are inundated with mind chatter that is so loud that it is difficult to hear guidance. How can we learn to trust ourselves when the voices in our head are screaming not to? Letting your imagination play is part of the process of listening to guidance. Stop listening to the voice that says, “This is stupid. This isn’t guidance. You don’t get guidance.” 

Here are some ways to begin to trust yourself. Once you trust yourself you will begin to trust others.

  1. Sit in a quiet peaceful place. 
  2. Holding yourself erect, your chin parallel to the ground, without moving your head, look up to your hairline with your eyes. This will quiet your mind.
  3. Breathe in deeply.
  4. Exhale slowly and completely.
  5. Repeat the deep breathing until you feel calm.
  6. If you have a thought just notice the thought, “Oh there’s a thought.” Let it go. Don’t judge it, don’t make comments on it, just let it go.
  7. Be kind to yourself. Breathe in love.
  8. Feel your body. Notice your stomach. Is it tight?
  9. Do not judge or criticize yourself. 
  10. Relax, breathe. 
  11. Ask yourself the following: Am I safe? See what your body says. Am I comfortable? What does your body say? What am I feeling? What feedback is your body giving you? Is your stomach tight? Are you feeling stressed? If so relax your shoulders some more. Relax and breathe. Are you yawning? 
  12. Spend 10 – 15 minutes each day like this quietly reflecting on what is going on in your body. 
  13. Quiet reflection or meditation can heal, lower stress levels, lower blood pressure and help you feel happier. 
  14. While you are sitting quietly notice what you hear. Do you hear another voice? 
  15. This is a great time to connect to your guides. Let them know you are open to receive their guidance. 
  16. Ask only to be connected to the highest of high, The Divine, God and your guides.
  17. Notice what you are feeling. 
  18. Notice anything that you sense, words, pictures or phrases.
  19. Write it down in a journal. Keep track of what comes through each time you sit in silence.

As you sit quietly each day, your confidence will build. You will feel more connected to yourself and The Divine (God). Trust of yourself will continue to grow as you connect to your Divine self or (High Self). Communing in this way with yourself opens you up to receive guidance. Everyone has the ability to do so. We just need to remember. 
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