3 Ways to Stop Self Sabotage

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Jennifer Elizabeth Masters in her OLD life

We are a work in progress. We are human. Recognizing that life is about learning and each perceived MISTAKE is another lesson learned well. Jennifer E. Masters


If I counted the number of perceived mistakes I have made along the path of life I would be so busy counting that there would not be time for much else. Life is about a series of events and choices. Sometimes we choose wisely, other times our choices are made for us, as we feel like we are on a conveyor belt and making choiceless choices instead. Self-sabotage happens when all we do is focus on the negative and see our glass as half empty rather than focusing on all our Blessings and gifts. As we focus on what we didn’t do or our perceived failure we rush down a spiral of ever negative ever defeating thoughts and anguish overcomes us.

There are ways to stop this. I did. I used to beat myself up endlessly. I was filled with so much self-hatred that seeing the events of my life as lessons did not happen. Relationships and marriages ending left me feeling like a failure and ashamed. It was not until I began to recognize that everything happened to my soul’s evolution, rather than to defeat me, I started to let go of the self-recrimination and self-abuse.

Each relationship and event we have shows us more about who we are. We find out our strengths, our weaknesses and above all, WE LEARN! Each life event, marriage, divorce, and break-up teaches us something about us. Lessons lived are the most profound. The issue most people have is that we downplay the wonders of ourselves and magnify our shortcomings. When we focus on what we didn’t do, we are allowing our ego to run the show. 90% of our thoughts are unconscious. Training our minds to be positive can be a full-time job. Self-sabotage is what happens when we allow our unconscious minds to run the show.

A Boat Without A Rudder 

When we allow our unconscious mind to run amok we create our lives unconsciously. Every thought we think even the most negative slip into our unconscious mind which is believed as truth and then runs the show. The unconscious mind doesn’t know fact from fiction or truth from falsehoods, which is why mantras done at the most optimum time are effective in reprogramming the mind. The key is consistency. Our brain needs to hear the same thing over and over to re-write old negative programming to shift us permanently. Thirty to sixty days of consistent repetition of mantras is needed to make it stick.

Lovingly Accept Yourself As You Are

  • Know that you are perfect as you are.

  • Constantly striving for perfection is a difficult task.

  • Who’s perfection are you striving for?

  • If you feel you will never have enough, you will never feel satisfied with you.
  • Chasing the world’s perfection is one source of our pain.
  • God has already forgiven us, we just need to forgive ourselves.
  • Know that you are already enough.
  • You are wonderful as you are.

Our ego unfailingly points out all of the errors and mistakes. Learning to quiet this negative mind chatter is the first step. An energy clearing would help get you started. Think about it this way, you wash your car, your clothes, and your body. What about your soul? Negativity sticks to us if we don’t clear it. You can contact me for an energy clearing here. Each time you have an argument with someone that energy sticks to you. Each negative thought that someone has about you, is also in your field. 

The most asked question when I do Akashic Records readings or channeled sessions is, “What am I here to do?” The resounding answer is to LOVE. We are on this planet to learn about ourselves and in the process learn to love ourselves completely and compassionately. What does that mean? It means that we all have faults. We have weaknesses. We also have gifts and strengths. The point of life is to accept our weaknesses with love and learn to deal with them, rather than to beat ourselves up for how lousy and rotten we are.

Here are three ways to stop the self-sabotage when you are in the midst of it:

Breathe. Most often when we feel bad about ourselves we are barely breathing. Take a deep breath and let it out completely. Do this twice more. With each breath let out all the no longer serves you. When you inhale envision and think about breathing in love and acceptance.

Stop the spiral of negative thinking with a short positive mantra: I AM LOVE. A mantra that begins with I AM connects you to your HIGH SELF and is more powerful. I AM LOVE. Say it slowly and repeat it until you feel grounded and lighter. You can use this throughout your day silently. It will help you feel more positive whenever you use it.

Train your mind beginning today to be more positive. Catch yourself when you begin to beat yourself up with your thoughts. Like any fitness program, this will take practice. You didn’t get this way overnight, don’t give up, keep at it. Know all negative habits need 30 days of consistent use to be overcome. 

Below are some suggestions for clearing your own energy to help you feel more positive when an attack of negativity happens.  

  • Soak in a saltwater bath for 45 minutes. Use regular table salt, or Epsom salts – a couple of handfuls and nice comfortable water. This will raise your vibration and clear negativity.
  • Meditate. Use my Divine Presence Process Meditation if you have trouble meditating by yourself. 
  • Tone or sing tones to clear the chakras. It does not matter what tone, or words, follow your guidance.
  • Use a simple mantra that is your go-to statement that allows you to calm and feel positive no matter what is happening, like, ” I LOVE ME.”

Not sure if you can do this on your own? You don’t have to. Let’s set up a time to talk. I’d love to hear about your situation and see if I can help. Email me and we’ll set up a time to talk.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.