What’s Missing Is Love and Tenderness

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Long weekends give us an opportunity to chill out, cook out and let down. Many people take road trips, go to the beach or camp out. Friends, family, and loved ones might gather, or you may decide, like I did, to stay at home, avoid the madness and watch a few movies. Men I have written this for you!

Italians, Spanish, and most Latins like to take their time with sex. Unlike most Americans that are so focused on instant gratification, rushing to reach an orgasm.  A steady diet of quickies could be leaving your partner flat and unsatisfied. 

Looking for scintillating sex? The longer the sex act lasts, the higher your excitement and stronger the orgasm. Slow sex is much more enjoyable as women usually don’t go from zero to orgasmic in less than twenty to forty minutes. If your sexual encounters are over in less than 20 minutes, it is likely that your partner isn’t having near as much fun or pleasure as you. Watch a few European movies witness the tenderness that most Americans lack. 

I have a recommendation for you. Watch Mostly Martha and see what you have been missing. It is available on Netflix. Here it is called Bella Martha. Yes, it has subtitles, but the movie is so well acted that you will quickly forget that it is in German. For the porn watchers in the group, this movie involves falling in love, connection, and romance. There is something for everyone in this movie.

Take Your Time

A long weekend gives you an opportunity to rest, cook wonderful food and have long, slow seductions. Americans are rushing everything these days, from fast food, to quick fixes, no one seems to take the time to be tender. Even American movies show couples hot for each other and then quickly moving to the bedroom, table or couch. I suggest this weekend that you watch a European movie and see how the Italians do it.

Slow Touch

Rushing from, “Let’s do it” into bed doesn’t give anyone time to savor the moment. Women need slow movements, extra time to decide they are open to sex, romance and seduction. Once we decide we are open, we need twenty minutes of foreplay before you get close to entering our tender vaginas. 

My Questions To You Men

  1. When was the last time you spent more than five minutes kissing your partner?  

  2. Do you touch her face when you kiss her?
  3. Have you ever slowly touched your partner and just watched her face, or reaction?

  4. When did you last give her a full body massage before entering her? A massage can give her time to enjoy your touch, warm up to the idea of making love.
  5. Do you ask her what feels good?
  6. Are you giving your partner what she needs?
  7. How much time do you spend on foreplay? If it is less than 20 minutes, she most likely isn’t getting what she needs.
  8. Do you have the attitude if she’s wet, she’s ready to go?
  9. Are you able to be affectionate outside the bedroom, so she doesn’t feel you only touch her when you want sex?
  10. Do you look her in the eyes when you have conversations?
  11. What are you afraid of?
  12. Do you make sex about pleasuring her? Or do you focus only on what you are getting?
My Questions To My Female Readers

  1. Do you bristle at your partner’s touch?
  2. Do you know what turns you on?
  3. Are you asking for what you need or want?

  4. If you can’t bare the thought of sex, kissing or his touch, what issues have you not brought to his attention?
  5. What are you afraid of? Talking about your issues may be a little uncomfortable at first, the air will not be cleared without it. Communication is key to understanding what is going on inside of you. 
  6. Do you expect your partner to just know? Even if he is a mind-reader, open communication is the best way to talk about your issues outside of the bedroom so that you can have deeper intimacy and connection in the bedroom.
  7. Do you remember what attracted you to him in the first place?
  8. How much attention do you give others?
    How much time, attention and tenderness are you giving your partner?
  9. What do you do to distance yourself from your partner? 
  10. How can you let go of your fear of intimacy so that you can have a deeper more meaningful connection?
  11. Are you aware that your partner wants to connect with you sexually to feel close to you, and will be more open to deep conversations if you have regular sex?
  12. Did you know that the more often you have sex, the more you will want it? Regular sex gets your hormones working the way that they are meant to. Sex and pleasure are possible well into your 80’s, don’t say EW!

Relationships thrive with attention. Putting your issues on the back burner will keep them there. They will continue to cause irritation and blocks to intimacy and pleasure as long as you ignore them. Contrary to what you might believe they won’t go away.

If you have issues in your relationship but are committed to making it work and don’t know how, drop me a note, let’s get your relationship back on track for passion, love, and tenderness.

Visit my website here. JenniferElizabethMasters.com sign up for my newsletter for insider details about new offerings and private messages from me. 

Check out my books on Amazon.com. Orgasm For Life is a great way to help you look at your relationships from a different perspective. Looking for love in all the wrong places? I can help you attract the one, that you have been dreaming of. 

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