Resistance Is Saying “No” to Love

By Jennifer Elizabeth Masters

Resistance is the way that we say “no,” to life, love, and the universe. When we say no, or resist, we are in fear. Fear blocks us from living life with wild abandon, or truly being happy. Most people that refuse acts of love are shut down in some way. They may have trapped emotions either in their heart or their emotional body. Sometimes we are reacting from past pain. Sometimes we are just reacting. The bottom line is if these patterns don’t change we will continue to say “HELL NO!” 

We can’t possibly be happy when we are in resistance to love. It is a form of judgment. Our true essence is love – giving and receiving. 

If we give too much, we are out of balance. If we resist love we are in fear.

Sometimes we push love away because we are afraid of being hurt. Sometimes we push love away because we don’t feel worthy. Sometimes we push love away because we want someone to pull us closer. The problem is these are mixed signals. No one really knows what is going on inside of our little minds when we don’t speak about what we are feeling.

“Don’t love me!”

Some of the ways we resist love are as follows:

  1. We resist receiving love. Our partner comes home from their day and goes in for a hug or kiss and we put our hand up, “I am too busy right now!” I don’t want to be bothered is the message we send out. We are resisting love.
  2. We don’t touch. We have many opportunities in relationships to touch each other. Touch may be the way your partner feels loved. If you don’t hug, hold hands, kiss or make love to your partner, they may feel unloved. You are pushing them away.
  3. We say NO! When we say no to our partner when they want to hug us, kiss us or make love to us, we are saying no to love. 
  4. We don’t spend quality time together. When we don’t give of ourselves by spending quality time with our partner, they may feel we don’t care, or even worse, love them.

I have written about Gary Chapman and his book, The 5 Love Languages before. This is a great book which will help you save your marriage, relationship and family. We each communicate differently. If we don’t let our partners and family members know we love them in the way they need to be loved, we are missing the mark. I highly recommend that you take Gary’s Love Language quiz here. 

Jennifer Elizabeth Masters is a passion and love coach. She empowers women and some men to love themselves fearlessly. Through this work all your relationships are healed. Love is the foundation for our lives. Without it, we can live our lives feeling depressed, lonely and alone. You can e-mail Jennifer privately, here to set up your discovery session to work with her. 

To have love, we have to give it to ourselves first. Jennifer guides you gently, kicking your ass, lovingly to drop the baseball bat and magnifying glass of perfectionism to focus with a soft lens rather than critiquing and loathing. If you have anger issues, cancer, anxiety, body pain, all these issues come from an emotion component first. All disease comes from a thought, then emotion around the thought that creates a block in our bodies. This block continues to be energized by more thoughts of not being good enough, not being worthy of love, not feeling loved. 

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