I have been in the spiritual community for over 30 years. During that time I have run into men and women who felt that they were closer to God when they were not having sex. I know women who deny their men pleasure for reasons unknown to even them. Sex is sacred. Sex is our God-given right. Sexual desire is part of our human experience. Sexual expression whether with another or ourselves is not only natural, but loving. Expressing our sexuality is not only normal, natural and healthy, it is the core of who we are.
I am familiar with the OM Meditation which uses female sacred sexual energy and puts it on a timer. 15 minutes is all you get to get charged up while your partner stimulates your clitoris (or you self stimulate) with his or her fingers. You can purchase a video which will teach you how to stimulate yourself for $29.00. You only get 15 minutes, not 16, not 20 and then you are left hanging. It is my humble opinion, that this meditation further perpetuates the lack of orgasm that most women have historically been missing out on for hundreds if not thousands of years. Ready, set go! People are even certified and trained to teach this torturous masturbation with no happy ending. You are are on the clock. “GO! You have 13 minutes to get turned on and maybe get close to having an orgasm!” A timed sexual experience is not sacred. The one thing that they do suggest is that you masturbate every day for 28 days. This is not a purpose driven masturbation. You only raise your energy to stimulate yourself to the point of being aroused, then stop. The one advantage of this is that it will raise your libido. So will masturbating through to orgasm. Do the same thing every day, for 28 days and you might want to bite someone’s head off!
How Would You Do?
See what you can do when your partner puts the timer on and attempts to stimulate you in 15 minutes. Men might have no problem, for women whose mind needs to be completely focused on the task at hand will have a great deal of difficulty.
Ask a child to eat his vegetables and put the timer on. Or maybe, “Do your homework, you have 15 minutes?” How would you do? Could you function? Could you perform? It has been scientifically proven that people taking tests that are timed will not perform at their peak, because they are under pressure. Putting someone on the clock to reach their peak, causes pressure that is unnecessary.
How Can Sex Be More Sacred?
Sacredness is breathing in the moment now. Experiencing all life has to offer in this moment. Being completely present in each breath. Walking outside, focusing on the beauty of the fresh air, the perfect clouds, the beautiful flowers and the heady scent that they send to your nostrils. It is seeing a rabbit in it’s natural environment run and hide. It is a newborn babe breathing his first breath. It is in the smile of our Beloved. Sacredness is living in this perfect moment now.
Allowing yourself to feel each moment fully. Looking into your lover’s eyes. Smiling and breathing in their scent. Feeling the tingle of their touch, as their fingers cup your face in caress. The feel of their soft lips on your mouth. That is sacred. Allowing yourself to experience it slowly, reverently, without rushing to orgasm. Breathing them in, slowly, awakening all your senses.
Sacredness could begin with a cleansing shower or bathing together. Talking with one another about your day. Massaging each other’s feet. Holding hands while you walk to your car after dinner. Smiling as your door is reverently opened for you. Sacredness is in each breath that you breathe.
Having a timed sexual experience takes you out of the moment and focuses on the impending DING of the timer in the near future, “How much more time do I have?” Sex should not be rushed.
Jennifer Elizabeth Masters is an authentic, compassionate and empowering healer, life coach and author. She lifts you up, encourages you and helps you to see things from a different and softer perspective. Her books are available on Amazon. Orgasm For Life is a guide for unbridled bliss and connected sex, deepening intimacy and creating happier relationships. The core of the work Jennifer does is self love. A lack of self love is the gap that causes all ailments, addictions and sadness. You can e-mail her here to set up your discovery session to see if her work is a good fit for your goals.